Mommy Needs a Nap, And Four Other Things I Say to Myself Every Day

As a relatively new stay at home mom, I talk to myself (a lot). Whether or not this is normal, I don’t know. But it’s what keeps me sane so I’m going to keep doing it. Because being home alone with a toddler can be pretty isolating. Sure, technically I’m not alone, but my communications are limited to a lot of “Please get off the table!”, “Stop kicking the dog!” and “Where did your shoe go?” Not exactly enlightened conversations. So I talk to myself a lot, mostly in my head, but sometimes out loud when it’s a tough day. These are the things I’ve found myself saying most, and my best parenting advice for what works and what does not.

1. “I’m really tired right now. I need you to watch the baby so I can take a nap.” Granted, I’m the only adult in the house, so this is just one

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   big tease. But I imagine saying it to my husband, or a relative as if they were in the room. No, it doesn’t really help. My fairy godmother has yet to poof from thin air and grant me leave to nap, but one can dream, right? And it’s not hurting anyone to put it out there. In fact, this is what (affiliate link) The Secret is all about! I’m putting it out there to the Universe.

2. “AYFKM?” Oh, I say this one to myself a lot. If you don’t know what this acronym stands for, you’re welcome to Google it but it’s vulgar so consider yourself warned. As a mom to a two-year-old, there are so many AYFKM moments. Things that happen that I never wish on anyone. Example? Well, a lot of my stories reside around poop, and messes, and baths, and floor scrubs to clean up such messes. You can use your imagination from there. Does saying the acronym help? Sometimes, when I can find humor in it. I try to imagine describing the story to my husband at the end of the day and how funny it will be then.
3. “Is this normal?” I think this one about 100 times a day. Whether it’s a toddler tantrum, a poop fiesta (see above), or my son is taking the pasta he loved the day before and dumping on the carpet, I often wonder if this is something every parent goes through, or if I just hit the toddler jackpot. And it works, too. If I google it and a lot of results pop up with similar situations, I feel so much better.

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4. “You can eat it. It’s still good.” Any food that hits the floor is fair game as far as I’m concerned. Sometimes, if the floor is really gross, I decide it’s not worth the risk of putting it back on my toddler’s plate, but my immunity is way better so it’s fair game for me. This also goes for stuff my son discards but still looks functional. The other day, my son licked off the icing of his pop tart and didn’t want the rest. Do you know what I said to myself? “Hello, breakfast!”
5. “I can’t do this.” Oh, why do I tell myself this? It never helps, it only brings me more down, and it eats me alive. And yet, it’s my gut reaction anytime my limits have been fully reached for the day. I’m truly working on this one because the fact is, as a mom and the only person in the house most days, I HAVE NO CHOICE. I have to do this. I am doing this. And I need to continue doing this. Sometimes, I just need to punch a pillow. Other times, I need to call my mom and cry. One of the best ways for me to get out of the funk is to take my son and dog on a walk. My son immediately goes from Tasmanian devil to happy go lucky, and the fresh air feels so good. Next time you’ve reached your limits, give it a shot.

Welcome to a glance into Celeste’s head every day. What do you think? Do any of these resonate with you? What do you catch yourself saying in your head all the time? Please share in the comments!

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