Some days motherhood is deeply satisfying. Most days it is not.
Lately, if I can make it to school drop off without shedding a single tear or threatening to take away everyone’s screen time for eternity, it’s a good day.
If I can get to bedtime without seriously considering running out the front door, it’s a good night.
And if I can do drop offs, pickups, extracurriculars, school homework, dinner and laundry without forgetting something, screwing something up, or – yes – crying. Then, wow, I don’t know what that would feel like but I’ll tell you if I ever find out.
I see so much satisfaction on social media. I see the soccer goals, the school pics, and the achievements. I see family photos that look like a Norman Rockwell painting, and I read stories about moms tucking precious notes in their kids bento boxes each day.
I see hugs, kisses, smiles and laughs. I see the satisfying moments, and they are lovely. Enchanting, even.
But I am here to remind you that those moments are tucked into a lot of really hard parts. Deeply frustrating, exhausting, and all-consuming. And so very unsatisfying.
And that doesn’t mean we are doing it wrong. And it doesn’t mean we suck. It’s just folded into the “things we don’t discuss” parts of motherhood. And I wish we didn’t. I wish we destigmatized the morning school dropoff tears with shouts of “I bawled my way to dropoff this morning and damn it, I’M STILL HERE!”
Because it’s the stories of mothers’ grit and determination… our stamina and resilience… that are the most satisfying of all.
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